英文好的童鞋可否有空来帮我修改 = =

柯佩奈叶子

Frankly, the same nightmare have happened in my sleeprepeatedly, almost it[貌似应该it almost ?] occupied my all[all my?] life, [这里是不是应该也要句号] i[ I 大写是必要的.无论是不是在句首] don't clear why this kindof my nightmare[也许可以用things或者其他词改一下?] never got [应该是gets吧 why引导的从句]ride of, but i  can make a opinion[opinion好像用在这里不是很合适..另,要是用前面也要用an] certainly,maybe the dark thing is my gloomy mentation, not serious[seriously], i look like ahealthy and good manner gentleman,[这里可以句号一下] however, too many rules and complexmanner,so[so是比较口语的词 也许可以用that makes 一个从句] i lose some friends, [句号] there are differences in background andhabit of people, else we [would] dislike each other,[句号] i  can't bear the foolishand selfish deed of some people, i  don't have strong power to changethem or the fact, [and] the dark and horrible magic is my desired powerabsolutely.

我的英文水平也有限,所以也只改了一小段=V=
感觉这篇文的用词需要注意 还有a/an 加不加s 连词也需要加强
还有最主要的问题是一段都是逗号 注意要用句号 转折或者表达另一种观点都要句号哦
也许LZ的同事可以试着自己先改一下
放到word里面 如果单词拼错 会有红线显示
句子结构错误 会有绿线显示
先做这2步好了^^加油



[ 本帖最后由 柯佩奈叶子 于 2009-7-30 12:49 编辑 ]