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(i forgot the color code-_-b)
Away home
Word count: 2,178
I have been known as the “Britney Spears girl” for a year now, ‘cause once I got makeup, hair styled, and some fancy cloth, I almost looked exactly like her. Nobody’s tired of this dumb name except me, and I was just a little Chinese girl before I got this “honored” name. But it’s not all bad, ‘cause this name doesn’t make me feel different, Britney Spears Hun?
But come to think of it, my Canada journey DO sounds like her life. Begins with an innocent little girl who works extremely hard for my English, now, look at me! I was just like a Canadian!
When I was young, I was just a normal little girl in Beijing, the proud capital city of China, along with like thousands of millions of other kids.
In my family, I was the lucky one; I was the only kid in my cousins who came to the capital city, and yet, I was the oldest one, and the only granddaughter on my mother’s side, and the only kid on my father’s side (well… let’s just add “not anymore” to it). Everyone of my grandma (my real grandma has five little sisters, so I just call then “grandma”) treated me like piece of a treasure, and I, every summer break, bring back my A+ report card. To me, life is competing, win, and get what I want and other people behind me with their mouth opened. I was proud of myself on many things, my mom and dad wanted me to be a perfect little girl, they’d made me went to piano lessons, art lessons, writing lessons, swimming lessons, and “manner lessons” from my grandma. And of course, school. My hair was cut once a month, so I was really jealous of those upper class girls who could save their long, pretty hair, I swear one day, will grow my hair longer than them. But don’t get me wrong; I once or twice in a month went to parks and play. I have best friend who care about me and my parents loves me a lot. But my pride makes sure I’m always ahead.
I run, and sometimes fall, when I fall, I stand up quietly and revenge the person makes me fall and beat them. That’s pretty much of my every-day life. For like 4 years…
And so far, I liked it!
When I was nine, one day, my mom announced the news that would change my life--- I’m moving, to Canada, in a month.
I was shocked.
I never learned English.
I mean, I know some… like “apple” or “hello”, but… that has a looooonnnnnnngggg way to go even for a “good enough”.
The next day, I quit all my lessons, and sigh up for “English beginners” for a month, everyday.
Every nigh, at 2:00 P.M. I finally put down my pencil and took a shower then fall dead in my bed.
Every morning, at 6:00 A.M. My alarm clock rings like crazy and I jump up to do my morning run.
Everyday, my friends ask me if I’m all right, the only thing I can say is, “I’m ok. Really.”
Like that, I struggled through a month. Because I was doing my eye-exercises, my eyes are normal, so I don’t need glasses.
Finally, I packed my things and walked on the airplane. Begins my new life.
On the plane, I fall fast asleep, when I woke up, it’s already dark—everyone’s asleep except me. I help myself a glass of coke and close my eyes… what if things changed and I’m not used to it? What will the life like in Canada? Will I be a normal kid there? What if I’m not used to the life there? Will my life ever be the same again? What if I got scared and do stupid things? …
“Breakfast?” Said a lady’s voice.
“Hum?” I looked at my watch; it’s two o’clock in the morning.
“Oh,” she noticed my action; “it’s morning in Canada right now. The sun’s gonna come up any minute now. But it’s all right if you’re not hungry.”
Ok, that was fast... TIME had already changed…
“No wait,” I said, realizing I hadn’t eat dinner yet. “I’ll have some, thanks!”
I picked a sandwich and she smiled, then I ask her when are we landing, she told me not long and walked away.
I sat there and ate my sandwich. I never notice food is so good! I ate it like a hungry wolf.
Are they eating sandwiches for breakfast? I find myself wondering after I finish the sandwich. It’s not what I used to but it’s good anyways. Change is not bad hum?
My plane landed in Vancouver airport hours later. My dad said we still have an hour ‘till our plane to Winnipeg arrives. I sat there in the bench and watch all the “strange” people walk pass by me, or those people mined their own business with a “strange” little girl stare at them. Anyway, it feels kind of weird. I spend rest my time practicing the English words I already learned—witches not much.
Finally, I’m in Winnipeg. When I arrive there, it’s already dark. I find my way to the apartment my mom rented and explored around. It’s all right… my head said.
I unpacked the things I needed, and went to bed.
The next few days, we did those things for coming to Canada (I don’t really know what is it… so…it’s “things”). So I get a chance to see more stuff about the city.
After we did all our “things”, I realize one important fact: I have to go to school. Only for a month (I came to Canada in May), but I still have to go.
I was scared and shy when I step into the classroom. All the English I’ve learned is gone. My head is blank as a bright white paper and my hands are sweating. I feel like run back home and crow under the table. But I can’t. I have to face it. My teacher introduced me and put me into a seat next to a blond girl. She was tall and thin, looks like a stick. She smiled at me and said “hi”. I said “hi” back and blushed. They’re pretty nice isn’t it? I thought, then speak up girl! I can do it. But instead doing what am I told, I followed my class around all day in school, I did not speak, nor do anything. I feel like person that does not know how to do anything, or think anything. I’m a piece of wood. Or worse, like I don’t even exist, well…let's just say it feel like I’m nothing.
The next day, I begin to have ESL. It makes me feel like a loser. Am I dumb enough to get myself learning English for a month and still did not pass ESL.
Then something like a year passed, I’m free, my summer.
But not long my mom took me to USA for one and a half years, in there, I have learned a lot of things. I can speak as a normal person, I have learned a lot about their (Americans and Canadians) culture and their ways of doing things, and I made friends. I find out for some times, I’m proud of myself again. I decided when one day, when I go back to China for a visit, I would show off all the things I learned here. But somehow… I caught myself wondering, are they ganna buy it?
No, my mined said, have you learned a lesson? They’ve changed. They could be jealous and dump you forever.
It all begins with the e-mail I got the other day; it’s from one of my friend in China (she’s not a very close friend though, I don’t really like her sometimes. But somehow I thought she would change.). She said she really miss me and send me jokes. And I told her my life in Canada. But sometimes, I was really busy (or lazy) not reply her e-mail. Then I made a forum and invited her and let her in charge of part of forum. I thought that would pay her for my laziness, but I was wrong. The next day, she invited a lot of people she said in her (and my, too) school that I never heard of, then they just chat and chat, I wouldn’t mined that but I find out that I don’t know what they talking about! So I get really upset and try to join in the conversations by being nice and try to catch whatever they’re talking about and join the conversations, but everybody ignored me like I wasn’t there, include her. Then she said she was the master of the forum and adds herself a lot of points for some old stories that she said she just wrote it, but actually I’ve seen it online for years. So I get really upset and mad at her and realize she hadn’t change a bit since I met her, then I tried to tell her don’t do it, and she can’t do it, but she won’t listen to me, but said she did wrote all those and I’m just jealous she can write! So I deleted the forum for good. And then, I never talked to her again. And I don’t ever want to see her or talked to her again, if my friends hurt me, the scar stays forever.
From now on, I think of my Chinese friends less and less everyday. Maybe is because of her, but the main reason is: I’m hurt. Badly.
When I was 11, I came back to Winnipeg again, but different from two years ago, I’ve grow, not only my looks, and my heart too. I’m mature now, I’ve grow my hair for 3 years so it’s really long now, I wrote the latest fashion, and live in a house. I changed my name to “Melanie” instead of my Chinese name (people have trouble pronounce it). I’ve changed, for good.
Then I went to the same school but grade six. I soon made friends and become kind of popular; thanks to all the things that I have offer in my head (clumsy, kind of dumb, and I love to talk), lessons I took in China and the hard works I have give (those things only works for the teachers. Well… but sometimes I help my friends do their homework… anyway, they’re pretty useful stuff if you know how to use it).
In grade 7, I went to a bigger school; I made a lot of friends there and meet a lot of people. I begin to hang out with all my friends (girls and boys) and I had my first boyfriend. I was excited and trying to keep my cool. My schoolwork doesn’t bother me because I’m a lot of teacher’s favorite. All thanks to my work in China. (See? It comes Very handy sometimes.)
I just love to hear “Hey Mel, howz it goin’?” at school, maybe some people don’t think “greetings” are important, but, I do.
But once or twice, I feel left out at school. One day at social studies, my teacher was talking about the kinds of people in Canada, some are British, some are Irish… all the student share their religion proudly, but what am I suppose to say? “Chinese people are moving to Canada now.”? It doesn’t make sense. And once or twice people answer questions with big words I’ve never seen or heard. I was really left out when this kind of things happened, really. Canada’s not my home country after all, I want to dig a hole and go back to my homeland.
I wanna be back to that place, the place I know, the place I lived, the place I called “home”.
I’m just a12-years old, who dreams to be a teen, who want to be the best, who worked, who shopped for a whole day, who believe a lot of weird stuff, who watches a lot movies, who likes hot guys, who has a lot of posters in their locker …
And, who wanna go home.
~The End~
A note from Mel:
Am I late? TT
This is what I went through, 99.99% true. I know that’s bunch of crab and you will ask me a questio: What the hell are you talking about?
I’ll answer then right now: I don’t know.
My head was full of junk and essays; I still have school works to do…5… sad…
Oh, and thx to the people who actually read them, that’s the best gift to me except money.
I’m really busy those days, if you wanna talk to me, add my MSN: [email protected]
Or PM me. PLEASE DON’T E-MAIL ME.
Surprised you have read that far…I’ll be fall asleep if I were you…
Anyways…
Thank you VERY much!!!
Hugs and Kisses,
Mel |
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发表于 2004-5-12 01:43:27
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